> > What's a "jaquizi"?
> That's a Jacuzzi that makes you queasy....
> BB
http://www.racesimcentral.net/ The Largest Usenet Servers in the World!
------== Over 73,000 Newsgroups - Including Dedicated Binaries Servers ==-----
> > What's a "jaquizi"?
> That's a Jacuzzi that makes you queasy....
> BB
> > Wonderful stuff! The spirit of Ernest Hemingway is certainly inside you.
> I was thinking more along the lines of Dr. H. S. Thompson. I sense quite
> a bit of gonzo influence in his narrative.
> --
> Scott aka Outshynd
> The driver formerly know as Outshined
> "33" in N3
> 27 in NL
> "And it comes to be that the soothing light at the end of your tunnel,
> was just a freight train heading your way."--No Leaf Clover....Metallica
So I can't ***ing shpell...........shue me.
Don't none of you ***ers give moi a hard time after what I've been through
last night...
There I was dressed in me racing gear (pyjama's and tellytubby slippers -
don't ask!!), talcum powder on me stots - for serious racing, you've just
got to mek sure your knackers aren't ganna get sweaty and schtick to and
pull your short and curlies - ooh ouch!!
So there was I,
Lying 7th around Monaco, toddling aroond in 3rd scared shitless giving every
***er that made a move the evil eye
"Keep outta my ***ing way..........!!!!!!"
Seriously..........how the sam ***ing hill can anyone drive aroond here
without making a right arse of themselves is beyond me....
I mean, what a bastard of a track..!!!!!!!!!!!
Powerin oot of the tunnel down the bank , managed to avoid the flippin kerbs
when I comes upon that ***er of a chicane padded with straw bails...
Gets me every god damned time, shifted doon teh 3rd (don't call me
chicken..!!) tried to flick the tub a quick left then right.
Did it work...did it ***.
Right front clips the corner of the bail, puts me in a fast spin, engine
rev's off the ***ing scale as sparks and pieces of gearbox explode behind
me hintend...
"Aw ***ing sheeeeeeeite...!!" I wail banging me nut on the wheel as the
Lotus does a backflip and lands on me noggin crushing me helmet and making a
***y mess of me quiff.
"Press Esc......" it says, I'll give it a ***ing "Press Esc..."
AND.......
Whats piss-taking worse is that it was only the first ***y lap.
I ***ing HATE Monaco...whoever designed that ***ing track ought to be
taken out, strung up by his hairy knackers and butt-***ed by the biggest
bull they can find.
Like I said, I'm in such a ***ing state so don't *** me aroond.
idav
Who would like just once, ONCE to be able to get through Monaco without
looking like a total dipshit.
> > > What's a "jaquizi"?
> > That's a Jacuzzi that makes you queasy....
> > BB
> -----------== Posted via Newsfeeds.Com, Uncensored Usenet News
==----------
> http://www.racesimcentral.net/ The Largest Usenet Servers in the World!
> ------== Over 73,000 Newsgroups - Including Dedicated Binaries Servers
<SNIP>
Swear Word Count:
*** = 14
Damn = 1
Shit = 4
*** = 5
Ass = 3
Others = 4
---------------------
31
Total Word count = 300
10.5% of your whole note was swear words.
So every 9.5 words you cuss.
WOW
- James "Gunslinger" Wohlever
Techware Motorsports
http://www.racesimcentral.net/
Send ATTACHMENTS (Files) to:
> > What's a "jaquizi"?
> That's a Jacuzzi that makes you queasy....
Beers and cheers
(uncle) Goy
So I swear like a *** who's got a bad case of the clap........shoot me.
If you got as pissed off as me playing GPL you'd throw a ***ing wobbly from
time to time.
Don't get me wrong, I consider myself an ok pilot able to hold me own
amongst the also-rans (I'm no bragger - unlike some of you saps..:-)) but
there are times when this shlockware yanks my well endowed chain something
cronic.
AND don't tell me you've never given your telly the verbal diahorrea when
you've gone head-first into the - delete as applicable, tree, fence, drink
or mown down the whole Mr and Mrs Cardboard clan.
If anyone's offended by what I've got ter spout........
*** off.
idav
Whose still pissed-off after last night.
> >Sheesh......!!!!!!!
> >So I can't ***ing shpell...........shue me.
> <SNIP>
> Swear Word Count:
> *** = 14
> Damn = 1
> Shit = 4
> *** = 5
> Ass = 3
> Others = 4
> ---------------------
> 31
> Total Word count = 300
> 10.5% of your whole note was swear words.
> So every 9.5 words you cuss.
> WOW
> - James "Gunslinger" Wohlever
> Techware Motorsports
> http://www.racesimcentral.net/
> Send ATTACHMENTS (Files) to:
You mean that funny looking muppet........?
Am I missing something here, is this some sort of yankee code...extract the
urine out of the mother country.
You lot outta know yer place, if it wasn't fer us lot yed still be smoking
the wacky backy and get your therapy through a spirit guide.
I mean what the *** has a blue bug got to do with this.
Still, glad some of you take my schpeel with a healthy doze of ***...er
salt.
idav
> > Wonderful stuff! The spirit of Ernest Hemingway is certainly inside
you.
> I was thinking more along the lines of Dr. H. S. Thompson. I sense quite
> a bit of gonzo influence in his narrative.
> --
> Scott aka Outshynd
> The driver formerly know as Outshined
> "33" in N3
> 27 in NL
> "And it comes to be that the soothing light at the end of your tunnel,
> was just a freight train heading your way."--No Leaf Clover....Metallica
Oh... Cheero and all that.
--
Header address intentionally scrambled to ward off the spamming hordes.
cisko [AT] ix [DOT] netcom [DOT] com
> You mean that funny looking muppet........?
> Am I missing something here, is this some sort of yankee code...extract
the
> urine out of the mother country.
> You lot outta know yer place, if it wasn't fer us lot yed still be smoking
> the wacky backy and get your therapy through a spirit guide.
> I mean what the *** has a blue bug got to do with this.
> Still, glad some of you take my schpeel with a healthy doze of
***...er
> salt.
> idav
> > > Wonderful stuff! The spirit of Ernest Hemingway is certainly inside
> you.
> > I was thinking more along the lines of Dr. H. S. Thompson. I sense quite
> > a bit of gonzo influence in his narrative.
> > --
> > Scott aka Outshynd
> > The driver formerly know as Outshined
> > "33" in N3
> > 27 in NL
> > "And it comes to be that the soothing light at the end of your tunnel,
> > was just a freight train heading your way."--No Leaf Clover....Metallica
Philster
> Well.........gee swizzzz,
> Only a couple of you petrol heads wanna share the juice and chew the wacky
> backy with lil old me about how they blew away the Ferrari at
> Kyalami.........sigh.
> You lot seem more interested in techie talk than the "romantic" side of sim
> auto racing.......
> I mean fer ***s sake, this group should be more than a "Help...I'm stuck
> shop", I thought it was improving with the dignified posts about Greg Moores
> death, but alas....I guess most of you don't give a baboon's balls for sad
> ***ers like me who want to chew the cud about their virtual races and how
> the Artificial Intelligence is a bigger cheater than a cheetah.........
> Like the time I was going side by side with Senna through the curva grande
> with Mansell kissing my gearbox or how I made Schumacher look a right***as
> I stuck it by him on the last lap at Suzuka............
> Stories to be left untold, I fear.......ho hum diddly
> Of course if any of you wingding's want to prove me wrong........
> idav
> When his Lotus shifts to 6th its up, up, and ...............over the ***ing
> fence.
> > > Your giving Oscar Wilde a run for his money with your tales!
> > > > To all you rocket sprockets outta there in vroom vroom land........
> > > > I know how you all like to brag about how ferkin fast yer are aroond
> > Monza
> > > > in yer zippy little Lotus, how yah start to bubble when the frame rate
> > > hits
> > > > 2, how you "finished 2nd" because the AI bloke driving the soupped up
> > > banger
> > > > that beat yah is a cheating little ***er and blah blah is better than
> > > blah
> > > > blah 2...and so on......
> > > > But howz about putting your little ditties of sim racing stories in a
> > post
> > > > from the postieman...?
> > > > Like this...(er excuse the language..)
> > > > Its 7.30 and pitch black ootside.
> > > > I'm hunched over me wheel with the plastic to the floor sweating like
> a
> > > > noodle.
> > > > Its Spa....
> > > > I'm in 3rd place...NEVER been higher, I'm so tense I could crack a
> > walnut
> > > > with me arse cheeks...tongue sticking out of me gob in rapt
> > > concentration..
> > > > Me mechanic gives me the board....3 laps ter go as I bomb down by the
> > > pits,
> > > > arse wobbling like a jelly on the plate.........
> > > > "Grip for ***s sake...!!!!!!!" I shout thanking God that the missus
> is
> > > out
> > > > for the night.
> > > > "Oh Oh........shite.." I gulp...
> > > > For there in the mirror is that bastard Clark...getting closer and
> > > closer...
> > > > "Don't you even ***ing think about it..!!" as I shift up from 4th to
> > 5th,
> > > > engine squealing like a pig.
> > > > "Wahhhhhhhhhh haaaayyyyy.." I burp as I head down and up over the rise
> > of
> > > > that dangerous ***er of a turn.....Ea Rouge...I think..!!!!!
> > > > Glance left, right...
> > > > "Where'd dat *** get toooooooooo nnnnnnnnnooooooshittttttt.."
> > > > With a mighty roar and a higho silver, Clark jinks to the left and
> > powers
> > > > past me on the right giving me the ***ing finger.........
> > > > "Yer ***ing poncey shite......." I scream in my helmet as he
> disappears
> > > in
> > > > the distance.
> > > > I grip the wheel slavering like a lunatic...........eh..!!!!!!! what
> the
> > > > f..............?
> > > > The car begins to shake and wobble........
> > > > "A puncture.......!!!!!!!!ahhhhhhhh"
> > > > ..........straight over the nearest ***ing hedge..............game
> > over.
> > > > A little while later.......
> > > > The mechanic is standing there with hands on hips looking as pissed as
> a
> > > > newt...
> > > > "And what the *** do you call that then.............!!!!!!!!!!"
> > > > Er.......
> > > > Anyone else got AI tales to tell...make a change from listening to the
> > > usual
> > > > shoite....
> > > > idav
> > > > Master of the arse over***manoever.
> Oh... Cheero and all that.
> --
> Header address intentionally scrambled to ward off the spamming hordes.
> cisko [AT] ix [DOT] netcom [DOT] com
> > Eh?
> > You mean that funny looking muppet........?
> > Am I missing something here, is this some sort of yankee code...extract
> the
> > urine out of the mother country.
> > You lot outta know yer place, if it wasn't fer us lot yed still be
smoking
> > the wacky backy and get your therapy through a spirit guide.
> > I mean what the *** has a blue bug got to do with this.
> > Still, glad some of you take my schpeel with a healthy doze of
> ***...er
> > salt.
> > idav
> > > > Wonderful stuff! The spirit of Ernest Hemingway is certainly inside
> > you.
> > > I was thinking more along the lines of Dr. H. S. Thompson. I sense
quite
> > > a bit of gonzo influence in his narrative.
> > > --
> > > Scott aka Outshynd
> > > The driver formerly know as Outshined
> > > "33" in N3
> > > 27 in NL
> > > "And it comes to be that the soothing light at the end of your tunnel,
> > > was just a freight train heading your way."--No Leaf
Clover....Metallica
He was actually being quite complimentary to your work by calling it
"gonzo". I don't exactly know where the term originated, but it is
commonly associated with the works of Dr. Hunter S. Thompson, a
brilliantly funny writer who did quite a bit of writing for Rolling
Stone magazine in the 60s and 70s. Lots of "stream of consciousness"
ramblings, similar to your GPL reports. They actually made a movie
about him a couple of years back starring Bill Murray called "Fear and
Loathing in Las Vegas". I'm sure others more knowledgeable can
provide more details.
Count me in as one of your fans, and I look forward to reading more of
your race reports. Don't let the "thought police" in the group
inhibit your creativity!
Best,
rob
>You mean that funny looking muppet........?
>Am I missing something here, is this some sort of yankee code...extract the
>urine out of the mother country.
>You lot outta know yer place, if it wasn't fer us lot yed still be smoking
>the wacky backy and get your therapy through a spirit guide.
>I mean what the *** has a blue bug got to do with this.
>Still, glad some of you take my schpeel with a healthy doze of ***...er
>salt.
>idav
>> > Wonderful stuff! The spirit of Ernest Hemingway is certainly inside
>you.
>> I was thinking more along the lines of Dr. H. S. Thompson. I sense quite
>> a bit of gonzo influence in his narrative.
>> --
>> Scott aka Outshynd
>> The driver formerly know as Outshined
>> "33" in N3
>> 27 in NL
>> "And it comes to be that the soothing light at the end of your tunnel,
>> was just a freight train heading your way."--No Leaf Clover....Metallica
>> Wonderful stuff! The spirit of Ernest Hemingway is certainly inside you.
>I was thinking more along the lines of Dr. H. S. Thompson. I sense quite
>a bit of gonzo influence in his narrative.
No person's opinions can be said to be
more correct than another's, because each is
the sole judge of his or her own experience.
Idav, keep 'em coming!
Actually, this is just the kind of talk I miss at the pubs....you should
consider putting them on tape!
The GPLEA will probably ask you to do the first review of Snetterton in
time....
best,
matt
(hung over)
idav skrev i meldingen ...
>So I swear like a *** who's got a bad case of the clap........shoot me.
>If you got as pissed off as me playing GPL you'd throw a ***ing wobbly
from
>time to time.
>Don't get me wrong, I consider myself an ok pilot able to hold me own
>amongst the also-rans (I'm no bragger - unlike some of you saps..:-)) but
>there are times when this shlockware yanks my well endowed chain something
>cronic.
>AND don't tell me you've never given your telly the verbal diahorrea when
>you've gone head-first into the - delete as applicable, tree, fence, drink
>or mown down the whole Mr and Mrs Cardboard clan.
>If anyone's offended by what I've got ter spout........
>*** off.
>idav
>Whose still pissed-off after last night.
>> On the following date: Sat, 8 Jan 2000 15:21:27 -0000, said person(s)
>> >Sheesh......!!!!!!!
>> >So I can't ***ing shpell...........shue me.
>> <SNIP>
>> Swear Word Count:
>> *** = 14
>> Damn = 1
>> Shit = 4
>> *** = 5
>> Ass = 3
>> Others = 4
>> ---------------------
>> 31
>> Total Word count = 300
>> 10.5% of your whole note was swear words.
>> So every 9.5 words you cuss.
>> WOW
>> - James "Gunslinger" Wohlever
>> Techware Motorsports
>> http://www.racesimcentral.net/
>> Send ATTACHMENTS (Files) to:
> So I swear like a *** who's got a bad case of the clap........shoot me.
> If you got as pissed off as me playing GPL you'd throw a ***ing wobbly from
> time to time.
> Don't get me wrong, I consider myself an ok pilot able to hold me own
> amongst the also-rans (I'm no bragger - unlike some of you saps..:-)) but
> there are times when this shlockware yanks my well endowed chain something
> cronic.
> AND don't tell me you've never given your telly the verbal diahorrea when
> you've gone head-first into the - delete as applicable, tree, fence, drink
> or mown down the whole Mr and Mrs Cardboard clan.
> If anyone's offended by what I've got ter spout........
> *** off.
> idav
> Whose still pissed-off after last night.
> > On the following date: Sat, 8 Jan 2000 15:21:27 -0000, said person(s)
> > >Sheesh......!!!!!!!
> > >So I can't ***ing shpell...........shue me.
> > <SNIP>
> > Swear Word Count:
> > *** = 14
> > Damn = 1
> > Shit = 4
> > *** = 5
> > Ass = 3
> > Others = 4
> > ---------------------
> > 31
> > Total Word count = 300
> > 10.5% of your whole note was swear words.
> > So every 9.5 words you cuss.
> > WOW
> > - James "Gunslinger" Wohlever
> > Techware Motorsports
> > http://www.racesimcentral.net/
> > Send ATTACHMENTS (Files) to:
First to Greg...
***..?
Seein' as there's a flu epidemic sweeping Britain and I've got every sod's
share who hasn't got it yet.
Well, lemme see....alka seltzers, lemsips, paracetamol and vics menthol gel
rubbed into me chest by the missus.
Yep, I'm as drugged up as a paralytic newt.
**
I figure its also time to clear a few things up and put a few things
straight here.
I'm fast approachin' the roaring 40's, developing a spare tyre and the old
brain cells don't regenerate when I sneeze.
I've been reading this group fer about a year now, enjoying it heaps even
sorted out a couple a problems with my setups n'so on.
Personally I like the posts of pilots who describe how they've knocked a few
10ths off their personal best and so on.........tales from the track.
Something we all can relate to I'm sure.
Now I'm no Johnny***lately, I've been playing auto sims since the early
80's when the first mass produced computer - Spectrum 48k was released here
in the UK *** keys and all
Here's a little potted history of some of me favourites:
Chequered Flag - spectrum.
3D Deathchase - spectrum (Still one of the greatest games ever written)
Full Throttle - spectrum.
Pitstop II - C64.
Revs - BBC b.
Grand Prix 1 - Atari St. (Bought computer just to play this game)
Super Monaco GP - Jap Megadrive (Bought console just to play game)
Grand Prix 2 - Pc (THE greatest videogame/sim ever)
Grand Prix Legends - Pc. (Natch!!)
Colin McRae Rally - Pc.
F1 RS1/2 - Pc.
Midtown Madness - Pc (Totally cookie!!)
Driver - Pc.
+ noteworthies such as GP500, Superbike, Indycar 1/2 and countless others.
But
No Nascar........sorry just couldn't get me puddin around this type of
racing...boring.
So as you can see I've paid my dues.
So I thought I'd post a few missives about my sim life.
Seems to have an Ok response...so I'll flesh em out and post....just for a
laugh.
Oh the verbal invective..?
Well, swearing for the sake of swearing is the last refuge of an illiterate
idiot, but to swear INTELLIGENTLY thus enhancing a prose is an art.
I presume that the vast majority of you are ***s (18+) and can smile and
shrug, if anyone's truly offended or have kids who read here...I'll
apologise and stop.
No problems.
Hope you now see where I'm coming from.............no offence meant.
idav
> Oh... Cheero and all that.
> --
> Header address intentionally scrambled to ward off the spamming hordes.
> cisko [AT] ix [DOT] netcom [DOT] com
> > Eh?
> > You mean that funny looking muppet........?
> > Am I missing something here, is this some sort of yankee code...extract
> the
> > urine out of the mother country.
> > You lot outta know yer place, if it wasn't fer us lot yed still be
smoking
> > the wacky backy and get your therapy through a spirit guide.
> > I mean what the *** has a blue bug got to do with this.
> > Still, glad some of you take my schpeel with a healthy doze of
> ***...er
> > salt.
> > idav
> > > > Wonderful stuff! The spirit of Ernest Hemingway is certainly inside
> > you.
> > > I was thinking more along the lines of Dr. H. S. Thompson. I sense
quite
> > > a bit of gonzo influence in his narrative.
> > > --
> > > Scott aka Outshynd
> > > The driver formerly know as Outshined
> > > "33" in N3
> > > 27 in NL
> > > "And it comes to be that the soothing light at the end of your tunnel,
> > > was just a freight train heading your way."--No Leaf
Clover....Metallica