I've shamelessy copied and pasted from an email I received today, but
it did tickle me:
Universal Pictures announced today they plan to make a film of the
momentous
football match that took place on Saturday 2nd September 2001.
"Five-One" is
the tentative title of what could be next year's big summer hit,
depicting the American national soccer team's stunning victory over
Germany.
Nicholas Cage heads an all star cast as the captain of the brave US
Soccer
team haunted by the trauma of losing in the 2000 World Cup final on
penalties and the death of his wife in a riot caused by English
football
hooligans, and finds love in the arms of a female sports journalist
played
by Julia Roberts. Mel Gibson is the no-nonsense Swedish coach who
leads them
to glory, with Keanu Reeves, Ben Affleck, Matt Damon and Will Smith
playing
some of Cage's heroic team mates. Jeremy Irons is set to star as Sir
Nigel
Villiers-Smythe, the dastardly Englishman who coaches the German team
and
forces them to play with poisoned-tipped studs to try and cheat the
heroic
American team out of victory.
Director Steven Spielberg defended the film-makers' decision to focus
on the
American contribution to the victory over Germany and inaccurate and
even
imagined events in the story, saying, "Obviously we've had to take
some
artistic licence to make the story work on film, but I hope that what
we
produce will be true to the spirit of what happened on that famous
night."