rec.autos.simulators

The ANTI-GPL - a modest proposal

himrli..

The ANTI-GPL - a modest proposal

by himrli.. » Fri, 07 Apr 2000 04:00:00

Based on an article in last Sunday's New York Times and a survey done
through Cartalk.com, how about a sim based on the ten worst cars of
the last century?

Imagine slipping behind the wheel of, say, a Volkswagen Bus, a Renault
Dauphine, a Cadillac Cimarron, a Plymouth Volare or Dodge Aspen, a
Renault Le Car, a Chevrolet Chevette, an American Motors Gremlin, a
Ford Pinto, a Chevrolet Vega or, best of all, a Yugo!

No hill climbs here!

But just think about how much time you'll be able to spend in the
garage!

Whether points would be awarded based on speed or simply being able to
move is yet to decided.

The inability to move, of course, renders the entire discussion of a
physics model moot.  We're talking about modeling the behavior of
what, for all intents and purposes, is a piece of sculpture.  Smelly,
true, but a piece of sculpture nonetheless.

The only four wheel drifts these babies are going to be doing is done
an icy hill.  If you push first.

I am personally looking forward to driving a Vega - a car some
consider to be constructed of compressed rust - over a railroad track
and having it break in half mid-race.  Did I say race?  Maybe not.
Talk about e***ment!

Or the thrill of the first person perspective that lets you leave the
car and get out and push!  You'll be glad the Yugo has heated rear
windows when you have to push it across the finish line in the chilly
International Falls rally!

So, how about it?  Is there a market for this?

Remove "hi" from address or it will bounce....

J. P. Hovercraf

The ANTI-GPL - a modest proposal

by J. P. Hovercraf » Fri, 07 Apr 2000 04:00:00

Surely you jest! I'm behind the wheel of a 1980 Dodge Aspen every day of
the week! Now, now...stop drooling on my bumper...8^)

Seriously though, it's got the infamous slant six, the engine that
wouldn't die! The body and chassie will rust away and that engine will
still be running, assuming I can start it when it rains...

Hmmm...maybe this explains the strong urges to drive virtual Ferraris when
I get home.

J. P. Hovercraft

<snip>

jbo..

The ANTI-GPL - a modest proposal

by jbo.. » Fri, 07 Apr 2000 04:00:00

Hmmm . . . aren't all these cars already modeled in SoS and Ford
Racing? <G>

-- JB



> Based on an article in last Sunday's New York Times and a survey done
> through Cartalk.com, how about a sim based on the ten worst cars of
> the last century?

> Imagine slipping behind the wheel of, say, a Volkswagen Bus, a Renault
> Dauphine, a Cadillac Cimarron, a Plymouth Volare or Dodge Aspen, a
> Renault Le Car, a Chevrolet Chevette, an American Motors Gremlin, a
> Ford Pinto, a Chevrolet Vega or, best of all, a Yugo!

> No hill climbs here!

> But just think about how much time you'll be able to spend in the
> garage!

> Whether points would be awarded based on speed or simply being able to
> move is yet to decided.

> The inability to move, of course, renders the entire discussion of a
> physics model moot.  We're talking about modeling the behavior of
> what, for all intents and purposes, is a piece of sculpture.  Smelly,
> true, but a piece of sculpture nonetheless.

> The only four wheel drifts these babies are going to be doing is done
> an icy hill.  If you push first.

> I am personally looking forward to driving a Vega - a car some
> consider to be constructed of compressed rust - over a railroad track
> and having it break in half mid-race.  Did I say race?  Maybe not.
> Talk about e***ment!

> Or the thrill of the first person perspective that lets you leave the
> car and get out and push!  You'll be glad the Yugo has heated rear
> windows when you have to push it across the finish line in the chilly
> International Falls rally!

> So, how about it?  Is there a market for this?

> Remove "hi" from address or it will bounce....

Sent via Deja.com http://www.racesimcentral.net/
Before you buy.
Jeff Salzman

The ANTI-GPL - a modest proposal

by Jeff Salzman » Fri, 07 Apr 2000 04:00:00

On Thu, 06 Apr 2000 02:51:53 GMT, "J. P. Hovercraft"


>Surely you jest! I'm behind the wheel of a 1980 Dodge Aspen every day of
>the week! Now, now...stop drooling on my bumper...8^)

>Seriously though, it's got the infamous slant six, the engine that
>wouldn't die! The body and chassie will rust away and that engine will
>still be running, assuming I can start it when it rains...

Let's not forget that robust transmission or those well-designed hubs
in the front end. I'm personally partial to the see-through fenders
and those *** ballast resistors....
Kurt Steinboc

The ANTI-GPL - a modest proposal

by Kurt Steinboc » Fri, 07 Apr 2000 04:00:00

LOL!

I wish I could remember how Ray and Tom described the VW van ... but to
paraphrase, it was something like "a vehicle that was not only dangerously
slow and could blow over in a stiff wind, but also used the drivers legs as
the first line of defense in a front end collision."

Now THAT would be a great car to take around the 'Ring -- extra points for
finishing without laying it over on its side!

Kurt


David Kar

The ANTI-GPL - a modest proposal

by David Kar » Fri, 07 Apr 2000 04:00:00

Not to mention the world's easiest add-on cruise-control: a brick resting on
the accelerator.
--DK


[snip]

Mike Barlo

The ANTI-GPL - a modest proposal

by Mike Barlo » Fri, 07 Apr 2000 04:00:00

    A friend of mine spent a hell of a lot of money on just about a complete
overhaul of the electrical system.  Nothing we did would get the thing to
run.  Someone else suggested the ballast resister.  after changing that it
ran for a little while then quit.  we ended up changing it again and
changing the coil at the same time before it ran like a dream.

    I bet if we saw the car today, the wiring would be the only thing
holding it together<g>

Brad Wils

The ANTI-GPL - a modest proposal

by Brad Wils » Fri, 07 Apr 2000 04:00:00

Hey, you haven't lived until you've drifted a VW Vanagon (direct
descendant of the microbus) around snow covered roads. :-)  Lots of fun,
and heat too in the Vanagon.  The Microbus though, just not suited to
Buffalo, NY winters, we carried blankets, and ice scrapers for the
insides of the windows, since the defroster was, I believe powered by a
hamster blowing through a straw. :-)

--Brad



--

Ace

The ANTI-GPL - a modest proposal

by Ace » Fri, 07 Apr 2000 04:00:00

It'd be like Ford Racing all over again! Imagine, "Austin Allegro Challenge"
by EA. With a career mode that culminates in the chance to drive a Trabant!


><snip>

>Of course, the UK version would have to be changed a bit. We'd
>certainly need an Austin Montego, Austin Allegro, Lada Riva, FSO
>Polonez and maybe a Triumph TR7.

>--
>David.
>"After all, a mere thousand yards - such a harmless little knoll,
>really." (Raymond Mays on Shelsley Walsh)

Andrew MacPhers

The ANTI-GPL - a modest proposal

by Andrew MacPhers » Sat, 08 Apr 2000 04:00:00

Hehe, now there's an image which has lodged firmly in my head.

Andrew McP

Peter Ive

The ANTI-GPL - a modest proposal

by Peter Ive » Sat, 08 Apr 2000 04:00:00




>>Based on an article in last Sunday's New York Times and a survey
>>done through Cartalk.com, how about a sim based on the ten worst
>>cars of the last century?

>>Imagine slipping behind the wheel of, say, a Volkswagen Bus, a
>>Renault Dauphine, a Cadillac Cimarron, a Plymouth Volare or Dodge
>>Aspen, a Renault Le Car, a Chevrolet Chevette, an American Motors
>>Gremlin, a Ford Pinto, a Chevrolet Vega or, best of all, a Yugo!
><snip>

>Of course, the UK version would have to be changed a bit. We'd
>certainly need an Austin Montego, Austin Allegro, Lada Riva, FSO
>Polonez and maybe a Triumph TR7.

And that one made out of fibre glass (can't remember the name) that was
supposed to shatter on impact.
--
Peter Ives - (AKA Ivington)

No person's opinions can be said to be
more correct than another's, because each is
the sole judge of his or her own experience.

Eldre

The ANTI-GPL - a modest proposal

by Eldre » Mon, 10 Apr 2000 04:00:00



>Based on an article in last Sunday's New York Times and a survey done
>through Cartalk.com, how about a sim based on the ten worst cars of
>the last century?

>Imagine slipping behind the wheel of, say, a Volkswagen Bus, a Renault
>Dauphine, a Cadillac Cimarron, a Plymouth Volare or Dodge Aspen, a
>Renault Le Car, a Chevrolet Chevette, an American Motors Gremlin, a
>Ford Pinto, a Chevrolet Vega or, best of all, a Yugo!

A Yugo?  No thanks - they like to do high dives off Michigan bridges... :-(

Eldred
--
Tiger Stadium R.I.P. 1912-1999
Own Grand Prix Legends?  Goto  http://gpl.gamestats.com/vroc

Never argue with an idiot.  He brings you down to his level, then beats you
with experience...
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