Nurburgring Track guide :)

I was bored at work today and I've spent the last 4 evenings trawling round this track so I thought I'd write a track guide. From the start finish line you approach turn 1 which is called Veristderbrakingpoint. A tricky left hander that leads into a loooong right turn called Howlongizdis Korner. This leads to another short straight with a lefthander with banking on the outside of the bend known as Parkingfurnewbie mit Elplatz. Then it's on through a short complex of slow bends called Dietvistybitz. Then it's downhill to the first place at the ring where the car gets airborne. Icanseezeepubfromhier is a difficult jump but can be taken with some speed. Try to carry this pace through the next fast section down to the slow right hander called Brickenbridgenbangen. It's easy to understeer off here. Downhill again to the compression called Buttscrapen and round the tricky fast left hand kink called Votfoolplantdattreedere. After another slow 1st gear turn it's on through another flat fast section then into one of the most tight and difficult sections. This is where the track goes downhill with medium speed bends, banking on the right and hedges on the left. This section is called Soddingprivit Hedgenschtop. Continuing down hill you'll drive across two near identical bridges called the Blackundwhite Brickenbracken Bridgen. Uphill again now for a tight right then gather speed to the quick left kink called Updiebanker before the tight right that leads onto a fast section called Qvickundtvisty. A few straightforward turns then take you to the famous Karousel also known as Drivein Diegutter. The lap then moves on to a series of deceptive corners, the first of which is Drifterwiden. This leads to the Doppelganger bends, so called because the are almost identical to the stretch of track you reach about 20 seconds later on and cause of much confusion as you try to remember which bit is which. Both of these sections culminate in two very similar left turns with big drops just after the apex, known as the Ohschitzen turns. After the second of these the track slowly straightens out through a section of increasingly fast flicks called Nearlyschittenselfen. Almost at the end of the lap now, you'll turn next onto the long long final straight called Havakuppoftea. The straight is interrupted by a jump called Overrevvinengine Spitzenpoppenbangentuben and a very fast left flick called Buttklenchen Wheelgrippen Kurve. This fast section culminates in a series of slow corners called Nokrashnow and then it's over the start finish line for another fun filled lap! :-D Kev

>"Kevin Clark" <[email hidden]> wrote > I was bored at work today and I've spent the last 4 evenings trawling > round this track so I thought I'd write a track guide. <snip> LOL! Eldred, it's the perfect guide for you!!!! :) -- -- Fran�ois M�nard <ymenard> -- May the Downforce be with you... -- http://www.ymenard.com/ -- This announcement is brought to you by the Shimato Dominguez Corporation - helping America into the New World...

LOL!! Classic! Jan. =--- "Pay attention when I'm talking to you boy!" -Foghorn Leghorn. Kevin Clark wrote... > I was bored at work today and I've spent the last > 4 evenings trawling round this track so I thought > I'd write a track guide. > ><snip>

LOLOL loads :-))

Gutverigut... "Kevin Clark" <[email hidden]> a �crit dans le message news: [email hidden]...

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> I was bored at work today and I've spent the last 4 evenings trawling > round this track so I thought I'd write a track guide. > > > From the start finish line you approach turn 1 which is called > Veristderbrakingpoint. A tricky left hander that leads into a loooong > right turn called Howlongizdis Korner. This leads to another short > straight with a lefthander with banking on the outside of the bend known > as Parkingfurnewbie mit Elplatz. Then it's on through a short complex of > slow bends called Dietvistybitz. > > Then it's downhill to the first place at the ring where the car gets > airborne. Icanseezeepubfromhier is a difficult jump but can be taken > with some speed. Try to carry this pace through the next fast section > down to the slow right hander called Brickenbridgenbangen. It's easy to > understeer off here. Downhill again to the compression called > Buttscrapen and round the tricky fast left hand kink called > Votfoolplantdattreedere. > > After another slow 1st gear turn it's on through another flat fast > section then into one of the most tight and difficult sections. This is > where the track goes downhill with medium speed bends, banking on the > right and hedges on the left. This section is called Soddingprivit > Hedgenschtop. Continuing down hill you'll drive across two near > identical bridges called the Blackundwhite Brickenbracken Bridgen. > Uphill again now for a tight right then gather speed to the quick left > kink called Updiebanker before the tight right that leads onto a fast > section called Qvickundtvisty. > > A few straightforward turns then take you to the famous Karousel also > known as Drivein Diegutter. The lap then moves on to a series of > deceptive corners, the first of which is Drifterwiden. This leads to the > Doppelganger bends, so called because the are almost identical to the > stretch of track you reach about 20 seconds later on and cause of much > confusion as you try to remember which bit is which. Both of these > sections culminate in two very similar left turns with big drops just > after the apex, known as the Ohschitzen turns. After the second of these > the track slowly straightens out through a section of increasingly fast > flicks called Nearlyschittenselfen. > > Almost at the end of the lap now, you'll turn next onto the long long > final straight called Havakuppoftea. The straight is interrupted by a > jump called Overrevvinengine Spitzenpoppenbangentuben and a very fast > left flick called Buttklenchen Wheelgrippen Kurve. This fast section > culminates in a series of slow corners called Nokrashnow and then it's > over the start finish line for another fun filled lap! > > :-D > > Kev >

Okay, this time I really was rolling on the floor laughing my a** off!!! Robin

That was brilliant :) Soddingprivit Hedgenschtop, can't stop laughing at that one :)))))) "Kevin Clark" <[email hidden]> wrote in message news:[email hidden]... > I was bored at work today and I've spent the last 4 evenings trawling > round this track so I thought I'd write a track guide. ><snip> > > :-D > > Kev

In article <OPPR6.14980$[email hidden]>, "ymenard" <[email hidden]> writes:

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>>"Kevin Clark" <[email hidden]> wrote >> I was bored at work today and I've spent the last 4 evenings trawling >> round this track so I thought I'd write a track guide. > ><snip> LOL! > >Eldred, it's the perfect guide for you!!!! :)

Nah, not enough 4-letter words for my normal Ring driving experience... :) Eldred -- Dale Earnhardt, Sr. R.I.P. 1951-2001 Homepage - http://www.umich.edu/~epickett F1 hcp. +24.63...F2 +151.26... Never argue with an idiot. He brings you down to his level, then beats you with experience... Remove SPAM-OFF to reply.

Kevin Clark <[email hidden]> wrote in news:[email hidden]: > I was bored at work today and I've spent the last 4 evenings trawling > round this track so I thought I'd write a track guide. > <big snip> lol, If you drive half as good as you write, aliens should be seriously worried. Alex (alexti)

That was hilarious! Well done. Gary Kevin Clark wrote:

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> > I was bored at work today and I've spent the last 4 evenings trawling > round this track so I thought I'd write a track guide. > > From the start finish line you approach turn 1 which is called > Veristderbrakingpoint. A tricky left hander that leads into a loooong > right turn called Howlongizdis Korner. This leads to another short > straight with a lefthander with banking on the outside of the bend known > as Parkingfurnewbie mit Elplatz. Then it's on through a short complex of > slow bends called Dietvistybitz. > > Then it's downhill to the first place at the ring where the car gets > airborne. Icanseezeepubfromhier is a difficult jump but can be taken > with some speed. Try to carry this pace through the next fast section > down to the slow right hander called Brickenbridgenbangen. It's easy to > understeer off here. Downhill again to the compression called > Buttscrapen and round the tricky fast left hand kink called > Votfoolplantdattreedere. > > After another slow 1st gear turn it's on through another flat fast > section then into one of the most tight and difficult sections. This is > where the track goes downhill with medium speed bends, banking on the > right and hedges on the left. This section is called Soddingprivit > Hedgenschtop. Continuing down hill you'll drive across two near > identical bridges called the Blackundwhite Brickenbracken Bridgen. > Uphill again now for a tight right then gather speed to the quick left > kink called Updiebanker before the tight right that leads onto a fast > section called Qvickundtvisty. > > A few straightforward turns then take you to the famous Karousel also > known as Drivein Diegutter. The lap then moves on to a series of > deceptive corners, the first of which is Drifterwiden. This leads to the > Doppelganger bends, so called because the are almost identical to the > stretch of track you reach about 20 seconds later on and cause of much > confusion as you try to remember which bit is which. Both of these > sections culminate in two very similar left turns with big drops just > after the apex, known as the Ohschitzen turns. After the second of these > the track slowly straightens out through a section of increasingly fast > flicks called Nearlyschittenselfen. > > Almost at the end of the lap now, you'll turn next onto the long long > final straight called Havakuppoftea. The straight is interrupted by a > jump called Overrevvinengine Spitzenpoppenbangentuben and a very fast > left flick called Buttklenchen Wheelgrippen Kurve. This fast section > culminates in a series of slow corners called Nokrashnow and then it's > over the start finish line for another fun filled lap! > > :-D > > Kev

[email hidden] (Kevin Clark) wrote: > From the start finish line you approach turn 1 which is called > Veristderbrakingpoint. You bugger! :-) I've been thinking about doing something similar for a while, inspired by the fact that I can *never* recognise any of the names people use when talking about the Ring. Well done, great post. Andrew McP

Kevin Clark <[email hidden]> wrote in message news:[email hidden]... > I was bored at work today and I've spent the last 4 eveningstrawling > round this track so I thought I'd write a track guide.[snip] <rotlfmao!> Not just funny but far too true... "Votfoolplantdattreedere?" And... erm... the following wasn't any form of inspiration, of course? Das Maschine ist nicht fur Gefingerpoken und Mittengrabben. Ist easy schnappen der Springenwork, blowenfusen und poppencorken mit spitzensparken. Ist nicht fur gewerken by das Dummkopfen. Das rubbernecken Sightseeren keepen hands in das pockets. Relaxen und watch das Blinkenlights. ;-) Jonny

You should post this on the GPLEA gpl forum, give everyone a laugh :)

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> "Kevin Clark" <[email hidden]> wrote in message > news:[email hidden]... > > I was bored at work today and I've spent the last 4 evenings trawling > > round this track so I thought I'd write a track guide. > > > <snip> > > > > :-D > > > > Kev > >

Yea but Kev you missed the vittle houze in de' voods vith da Hozenfromfloppin twinz out phront vith untitsenshowin` :o)~ | Kevin Clark wrote:<snipped for space>

On Sat, 02 Jun 2001 00:24:08 -0500, Gary Stephenson <[email hidden]> wrote: >That was hilarious! Well done. > >Gary > >Kevin Clark wrote:Nurburgring Guide: Great names for my favorite course. Good Work! Sam

Kevin Clark wrote: > > I was bored at work today and I've spent the last 4 evenings trawling > round this track so I thought I'd write a track guide. Lol! Sat was so funy, I almosst pisst in se pands. Veristderbrakingpoint Howlongizdis Korner Parkingfurnewbie mit Elplatz Dietvistybitz Icanseezeepubfromhier Brickenbridgenbangen Buttscrapen Votfoolplantdattreedere Soddingprivit Hedgenschtop Blackundwhite Brickenbracken Bridgen Updiebanker Qvickundtvisty Drivein Diegutter Drifterwiden Doppelganger bends Ohschitzen turns Nearlyschittenselfen Havakuppoftea Overrevvinengine Spitzenpoppenbangentuben Buttklenchen Wheelgrippen Kurve Nokrashnow -- l8er ronny Your mouse has moved. Windows must be restarted for the change to take effect. Reboot now?

Andrew MacPherson wrote:

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> > [email hidden] (Kevin Clark) wrote: > > > From the start finish line you approach turn 1 which is called > > Veristderbrakingpoint. > > You bugger! :-) I've been thinking about doing something similar for a > while, inspired by the fact that I can *never* recognise any of the names > people use when talking about the Ring. > > Well done, great post. > > Andrew McP

hehe. Sorry. It was inspired by a post on the GPLEA forum. Someone was having trouble with a corner and described it along the lines of, 'you know the bit where it's fast and down hill, after that bit it goes left......for about 4 lines.......THAT corner. That's the one I can't do' I knew exaclty which one he meant. Someone replied saying it's much easier if you just say it (I dunno) Scloppen Korner or something. If he'd said that in the original post, I'd have had no idea whatsoever which one it was :) Glad you liked it. Kev

Kevin Clark <[email hidden]> wrote in message news:[email hidden]... > I knew exaclty which one he meant. Someone replied saying it's much > easier if you just say it (I dunno) Scloppen Korner or something. If > he'd said that in the original post, I'd have had no idea whatsoever > which one it was :) You realise you may have re-defined the way we refer to corners on the 'Ring now ;-) I can't drive down the s/f straight without thinking "coming up to Veristderbrakingpoint"! Brilliant stuff. Jonny

Kevin, I wonder if you or someone could make up a map that would go in the opening of "The Ring" inside GPL with your turns in it? Just a thought.. A good one too.. <g>

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| Kevin Clark <[email hidden]> wrote in message | news:[email hidden]... | | I knew exaclty which one he meant. Someone replied saying it's much | easier if you just say it (I dunno) Scloppen Korner or something. If | he'd said that in the original post, I'd have had no idea whatsoever | which one it was :)

<snipped>

Thom j. <[email hidden]> wrote in message news:NtQS6.29243$[email hidden]... > Kevin, I wonder if you or someone could make up a map that would > go in the opening of "The Ring" inside GPL with your turns in it?Just > a thought.. A good one too.. <g> I've done one, but I've edited off the 'centre of pages' fade etc for printing purposes, and it's only a gif... About twenty minutes work in PSP to a moderate standard! Jonny

Jonny can it be transferred into GPL something like they do when they upgrade the tracks, menus, etc?? A Kevin type visual map would help me remember all the turns etc.. No B.S... What ya think? "Jonny Hodgson" wrote:

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| Thom j. wrote: | > Kevin, I wonder if you or someone could make up a map that | > would go in the opening of "The Ring" inside GPL with your turns | > in it? Just a thought.. A good one too.. <g> | | I've done one, but I've edited off the 'centre of pages' fade etc for | printing purposes, and it's only a gif... About twenty minutes work in | PSP to a moderate standard! | Jonny

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Hey, not a bad idea! This is how you do it http://home.online.no/~bi-knu/editing/covers.htm Looks pretty easy. I might try that tonight. Kev

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> Kevin, I wonder if you or someone could make up a map that would > go in the opening of "The Ring" inside GPL with your turns in it? Just > a thought.. A good one too.. <g> > > | Kevin Clark <[email hidden]> wrote in message > | news:[email hidden]... > | > | I knew exaclty which one he meant. Someone replied saying it's much > | easier if you just say it (I dunno) Scloppen Korner or something. If > | he'd said that in the original post, I'd have had no idea whatsoever > | which one it was :) > <snipped>

Kevin tell me how you make out..ok? I was in the commercial graphic arts field for 30+years and maybe I might give it a whirl too.. Its been awhile since I have been apart of a graphic project but lets see how you make out first..lol Good Luck Thom_j. "Kevin Clark" <[email hidden]> wrote in message news:[email hidden]... | Hey, not a bad idea! | This is how you do it | http://home.online.no/~bi-knu/editing/covers.htm | Looks pretty easy. I might try that tonight.<snipped> --- Outgoing mail is certified Virus Free. Checked by AVG anti-virus system (http://www.grisoft.com). Version: 6.0.256 / Virus Database: 129 - Release Date: 5/31/2001

Thom j. <[email hidden]> wrote in message news:fJUS6.29784$[email hidden]... > Jonny can it be transferred into GPL something like they do whenthey > upgrade the tracks, menus, etc?? A Kevin type visual map would help > me remember all the turns etc.. No B.S... What ya think? Could probably be done, but I don't have the relevant tools to make it into a .mip or whatever's needed... Jonny

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> "Jonny Hodgson" wrote: > > | Thom j. wrote: > | > Kevin, I wonder if you or someone could make up a map that > | > would go in the opening of "The Ring" inside GPL with your turns > | > in it? Just a thought.. A good one too.. <g> > | > | I've done one, but I've edited off the 'centre of pages' fade etc

for > | printing purposes, and it's only a gif... About twenty minuteswork in > | PSP to a moderate standard! > | Jonny

Ok Jonny! I got the stuff.. I might be able to try this? I am not good on program change-over type graphics but I have done graphics for decades.. Let me see what I can mess up?...lol Thanx Again!! Cheers Thom_j. "Jonny Hodgson" wrote: <snipped> | Could probably be done, but I don't have the relevant tools to make it | into | a .mip or whatever's needed... | | Jonny<snipped again> --- Outgoing mail is certified Virus Free. Checked by AVG anti-virus system (http://www.grisoft.com). Version: 6.0.259 / Virus Database: 130 - Release Date: 6/5/2001

"Thom j." wrote: > > Ok Jonny! I got the stuff.. I might be able to try this? I am not good > on program change-over type graphics but I have done graphics for > decades.. Let me see what I can mess up?...lol Thanx Again!! > Cheers Thom_j. I made it last night. I uploaded a jpg preview to my web site..... but stupidly I've forgotten what I called it :) I'll have to wait 5 hours to get back home again and find out. Kev

Well hurry up & leave early will ya Kevin??.....lol "Kevin Clark" wrote: | I made it last night. I uploaded a jpg preview to my web site..... but | stupidly I've forgotten what I called it :) | | I'll have to wait 5 hours to get back home again and find out. | | Kev --- Outgoing mail is certified Virus Free. Checked by AVG anti-virus system (http://www.grisoft.com). Version: 6.0.259 / Virus Database: 130 - Release Date: 6/5/2001

Ah! Found out why it didn't work. I'd made a typo in the picture name. Anyway, here it is http://www.btinternet.com/~kevin.clark8/ringccover.jpg Whatcha think? Kev

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> Well hurry up & leave early will ya Kevin??.....lol > > "Kevin Clark" wrote: > | I made it last night. I uploaded a jpg preview to my web site..... but > | stupidly I've forgotten what I called it :) > | > | I'll have to wait 5 hours to get back home again and find out. > | > | Kev > > > --- > Outgoing mail is certified Virus Free. > Checked by AVG anti-virus system (http://www.grisoft.com). > Version: 6.0.259 / Virus Database: 130 - Release Date: 6/5/2001

Kevin Clark <[email hidden]> wrote in message news:[email hidden]... > Ah! Found out why it didn't work. I'd made a typo in the picturename. Anyway, here it is > > http://www.btinternet.com/~kevin.clark8/ringccover.jpg > > Whatcha think? Spot on - love the image on the left! How scary is it that we know *exactly* which corners are meant? Although I think I'd swap "Qvickundtvisty" with "Nearschittenselfen"... ;-) Jonny

FANTASTIC!!! Now can it be implemented into GPL or no? Great Job Kevin!! I'm a greedy so & so aint I?....lol "Kevin Clark" wrote:

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| Ah! Found out why it didn't work. I'd made a typo in the picture name. | Anyway, here it is | http://www.btinternet.com/~kevin.clark8/ringccover.jpg | | Whatcha think? | | Kev

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Hey Jonny!!! Dont you dare do that!! We have it Trademark'ed and also Copyright'ed! Grrrrrrrrrrr ..lol :-) "Jonny Hodgson" wrote: | How scary is it that we know *exactly* which corners are meant? | Although I think I'd swap "Qvickundtvisty" with | "Nearschittenselfen"... ;-) | Jonny --- Outgoing mail is certified Virus Free. Checked by AVG anti-virus system (http://www.grisoft.com). Version: 6.0.259 / Virus Database: 130 - Release Date: 6/5/2001

"Thom j." wrote: > > FANTASTIC!!! Now can it be implemented into GPL or no? Yeah it's dead easy. I'll zip up the pages tonight, then you just drop them into the nurburg track folder. Simple. Only trouble is, the inside smaller track map is a bit more tricky. Cos my names are long and the inside map is smaller, it looks too cramped and is a bit illegible. Kev

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> Great Job Kevin!! I'm a greedy so & so aint I?....lol > > "Kevin Clark" wrote: > | Ah! Found out why it didn't work. I'd made a typo in the picture name. > | Anyway, here it is > | http://www.btinternet.com/~kevin.clark8/ringccover.jpg > | > | Whatcha think? > | > | Kev > > --- > Outgoing mail is certified Virus Free. > Checked by AVG anti-virus system (http://www.grisoft.com). > Version: 6.0.259 / Virus Database: 130 - Release Date: 6/5/2001

Thats ok if its cramped in my book!! Get it? My Book...lol {Oops sorry its still early here.} So if you would be so kind when you are done your masterpiece please send it...Again Great work Kevin! Thom_j. "Kevin Clark" wrote:

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| Yeah it's dead easy. I'll zip up the pages tonight, then you just drop | them into the nurburg track folder. Simple. | | Only trouble is, the inside smaller track map is a bit more tricky. Cos | my names are long and the inside map is smaller, it looks too cramped | and is a bit illegible. | | Kev |

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I just uploaded it. The smaller page needs some more work so I've just put the front cover and main page in the zip file http://www.btinternet.com/~kevin.clark8/index.htm Kev

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> Thats ok if its cramped in my book!! Get it? My Book...lol {Oops > sorry its still early here.} So if you would be so kind when you are > done your masterpiece please send it...Again Great work Kevin! > Thom_j. > > "Kevin Clark" wrote: > | Yeah it's dead easy. I'll zip up the pages tonight, then you just drop > | them into the nurburg track folder. Simple. > | > | Only trouble is, the inside smaller track map is a bit more tricky. Cos > | my names are long and the inside map is smaller, it looks too cramped > | and is a bit illegible. > | > | Kev > | > > > --- > Outgoing mail is certified Virus Free. > Checked by AVG anti-virus system (http://www.grisoft.com). > Version: 6.0.259 / Virus Database: 130 - Release Date: 6/5/2001

Downloaded it, unzipped it & put it in my ring track directory Kevin .. Thanx loads!! Thom_j. "Kevin Clark" wrote: | I just uploaded it. | The smaller page needs some more work so I've just put the front cover | and main page in the zip file | http://www.btinternet.com/~kevin.clark8/index.htm<snipped> --- Outgoing mail is certified Virus Free. Checked by AVG anti-virus system (http://www.grisoft.com). Version: 6.0.259 / Virus Database: 130 - Release Date: 6/5/2001